Everyone is doing their best. So why does it still get stuck?

You work with professionals, young and old. Good people, engaged, no one gets out of bed to make things complicated. Yet sometimes it gets tough. Some people always seem to arrive just a bit too late, others take on too much. Deadlines slip. Conversations stay superficial. An agreement is misunderstood. "I thought you would take care of that." 

Maybe it's too busy. Or just the time of year. So we wait and see. But meanwhile, there are islands forming in the team. People become fatigued. Someone drops out. Someone else resigns. What is happening?

Expectations in Teams: A Silent Disturbance

We often look for the cause in visible things: a poor schedule, too much work, too few people. But beneath that surface lies a more fundamental problem: a mismatch in expectations. About what work is. About what we can ask of each other. About what you are expected to give and what you can expect in return.

These expectations in teams are often implicit. And that makes them risky. You can be affected by them without realizing it.

Expectations in Teams are Often Unspoken

Collaboration seems straightforward. Dividing tasks, coordinating, trusting that everyone takes responsibility. But people bring their own reference framework: about autonomy, feedback, balance, or meaning. 

Often, explicit agreements about this are lacking. This leads to unspoken expectations, for example about:

• How quickly are you available?

• When can you say no?

• In what way do you provide feedback?

In practice, answers to those questions vary significantly. Especially in teams with differences in generation, experience, or life stage. What feels clear to one person may feel controlling to another. What one experiences as space, the other experiences as a lack of guidance.

And as long as those differences in expectations remain unspoken, friction arises. Or even conflict in teams.

Friction from Generational Differences

Expectations are not only about work. They are about values: about how people view responsibility, well-being, and leadership. 

New generations, like Gen Z, have a different standard in this regard. According to Deloitte (2023), almost 90% of Gen Z and millennials find purpose, growth, and mental health crucial for job satisfaction. However, discussing mental health is still far from self-evident: almost 3 out of 10 young people fear that their manager will treat them differently if they share something.

Older generations were shaped in a different time. Work pressure was part of it. Showing emotions was often seen as a weakness. Working extra hours meant loyalty, and feedback came from above, not from colleagues.

What seems self-evident to one (“just keep pushing through”) feels unsafe to another (“I don’t dare to say it’s too much”). 

Burnout from Clashing Expectations

When someone drops out, we often point to work pressure. But it often goes deeper: 

• Not feeling free to set boundaries

• Being structurally unheard

• Consistently having to choose against your values

According to CBS, 1 in 5 employees experiences burnout symptoms. Research by Deloitte shows that 40% of Gen Z and 35% of millennials feel stressed often to all the time. Burnout symptoms like exhaustion, worrying, and sleeplessness do not arise suddenly. They build up when a worker's expectations consistently clash with the work environment. 

Generations as a Conversation Starter: Prevent Conflict and Turnover

We regularly see it: teams with good people who still become fatigued. Not out of unwillingness, but because the conversation about expectations, values, and working methods is lacking. Therefore, we don't use generations as categories, but as hooks. As a conversation starter.  A way to discuss expectations, communication, and collaboration.

The younger colleague who desires autonomy and the older colleague who shows engagement by always being present: they both want the best for the team. But without context, there is no mutual understanding.